Taking The Risk For Love
by Doctor Addison Montgomery
Summary: JuneJim. She had chosen Rod. He was the safe option, the one who would give her a secure life, and probably a happy one. But it was no substitute for real love. Please review! xx


Taking The Risk For Love

Summary: JuneJim. She had chosen Rod. He was the safe option, the one who would give her a secure life, and probably a happy one. But it was no substitute for real love.

My first (and last) piece of JuneJim fanfiction. This is what I thought should have happened after Thursday's episode. How could she choose Rod over Jim?!

Please review! Vikki x.

* * *

It was hard to pinpoint exactly where it had began but it had ended that night. June had been forced to make one of the most difficult and most painful decisions of her life, and she been faced with a fair few in the past. How was she supposed to choose between the two men that she loved so much? Jim and Rod were to completely different men but she loved them both. Maybe Jim symbolised her past and Rod was what she could look forward to in the future. June knew that she couldn't trust herself to give her heart to Jim again, he had hurt her before. More than that he had humiliated her and betrayed her, but she still loved him so much that it hurt. It had hurt to walk away from Sun Hill, more than she had thought it would but for very different reasons. Leaving behind twenty-three years of service and a group of people she cared deeply about had been painful but Jim's unexpected return was another heartache she didn't need right now. Her and Rod were meant to be disappearing into the sunset together, to get married and to live out a blissful retirement. June had wanted that, she had wanted it badly, that was until Jim Carver had entered her life again.

* * *

Walking away from the station had seemed like the right thing to do. Telling Jim that there was never going to be another chance for them had morally been the right thing to do but it had hurt June to do that. It still hurt her as she crossed the car park, hand in hand with her fiancé. Her thoughts were distracted and Rod thought he knew why although he didn't voice his suspicions. In truth he was surprised that he and June had made it through today and were still together. It had been one hurdle after another and the added issue of Jim Carver had hardly been a welcome one to Rod Jessop. He knew that June still loved her ex husband, it was obvious. But here they were, still engaged and still together while Jim Carver returned to Manchester alone.

* * *

Jim ran a hand through his hair and let out an exhausted sigh. He knew he needed to sleep and should spend the night in a hotel somewhere before driving back to Manchester but he couldn't bear to spend another moment in this city. He shouldn't have been surprised that June had turned him down, he had treated her appallingly in the past and she deserved better. Somehow he just didn't think Rod Jessop was the man to give her everything she needed, or more importantly what she wanted. He knew her better than she knew herself and certainly more than Rod knew her. Jim knew that June didn't want this kind of life but she had convinced herself that it was what she wanted and nothing, not even her love for Jim, was going to convince her otherwise. It was hard to resist the temptation to drink, he wanted to escape but he knew that would be going about things in entirely the wrong way. He just wanted to get home.

* * *

With the wedding plans and settling into retirement, June had little time to think about Jim. Although, every spare second she had sent her thoughts flying to him. She wondered how he was and what he was doing but couldn't bring herself to call him or even write. His life wasn't her business anymore but she still cared, she had admitted that she still loved him. It was a sunny April afternoon and June and Rod were writing their wedding invitations, sitting at the dining room table. June knew that she had to invite Jim, it would be painful but it might be good for them both. They could finally put these feelings to bed.

* * *

Jim dragged himself up from the sofa a few days later and set his black coffee down on the table. He went to the door and picked up the post that had landed unceremoniously on the mat. He recognised the writing straightaway, how could he forget June Ackland's familiar script? He wondered what it could be, the envelope looked more decorative than formal so he guessed she wasn't returning the cheque. It was a wedding invitation. He should have known. Jim didn't know what to do, could he stand the agony of watching the woman he loved marry another man? At the same time the wedding invitation showed him that June wanted him to be there, so he would be.

* * *

June was having cold feet. Her cold feet were slowly turning into cold ankles now. Three months of retirement with Rod had been an interesting experience, it didn't quite beat being held hostage at gunpoint but it came pretty close. Until they spent almost every waking hour together June had realised how incompatible she and Rod actually were. Everything he did made her think of Jim and how he would most likely do the opposite. Rod was so particular and so dull to be with for such long periods of time. With Jim things had been so much different, he had always had some crazy plan or idea that would make life just a bit more interesting. June had wanted a peaceful retirement with a steady man but now she had both of these things she wasn't quite so convinced.

* * *

The wedding went ahead as planned although June's doubts were growing as the days passed. She had asked Gina and Sam to be her bridesmaids and for old times sake, Jack Meadows would be giving her away. Everything seemed perfect, the dresses, the flowers and the catering but June felt empty and hollow. Jim had replied, telling her that he would be there and June felt ridiculously happy about this.

* * *

Jim arrived the day before the wedding and booked into a hotel in Canley. It felt strange to be back in London again, seeing the familiar sites and the memories attached to them. It was painful but he knew it was doing him good too. As he took an early evening walk along the London streets he felt as if he was home again. He was only booked to stay for two nights and that seemed long enough. When he returned to his hotel room he unpacked his smart suit and hung it up to get rid of the creases. The wedding was tomorrow and he had mixed feelings about it. He knew it wasn't going to be an easy day for anyone involved but he wanted June to enjoy it, she deserved it.

* * *

June was a bag of nerves when Gina Gold arrived at her house the next morning. Straightaway Gina could tell that something was wrong with her friend and guessed it had something to do with the presence of a certain Sergeant Carver.

"You didn't have to invite him June, I think he would have understood." She said.

June sighed before she replied. "I know, but I wanted him to be here. Now I don't even think I want to be here."

Gina looked slightly shocked but not particularly surprised.

"You still love him don't you?"

June nodded slowly, looking away.

"And what about Rod?"

June shook her head. "It sounds so awful I know, but I don't love him like I've always loved Jim."

Gina put her hand on June's arm. "Then you have to tell them. Both of them."

* * *

Jim arrived at the church to find it deserted and he was confused. He walked inside where the vicar was standing.

"Can I help you?" He asked Jim.

"I'm here for the wedding." He replied.

The vicar looked sympathetic. "I'm sorry but the wedding was cancelled. It was called off at the last minute."

"Who called it off?" Jim asked, a note of urgency in his voice.

"The bride, I think." The vicar replied, a little puzzled now.

"Thank you!" Jim replied, running from the church and driving back to his hotel. As he walked along the corridor he saw an instantly familiar blonde figure waiting outside his hotel room. It was obvious she had been crying.

"June?" Jim asked as he approached. "What's happened? Is everything okay?"

June burst into tears again, words pouring out of her as she explained that she couldn't marry Rod, the man whom she did not love. Jim wrapped his arms around her as she sobbed, comforting her.

"I had nowhere else to go."

"It's okay." Jim soothed rubbing her lower back.

"I still love you Jim." She said. He nodded, words weren't needed. For one last time June was ready to take the risk for love.


End file.
